As someone who has been self-employed for the last eight years, I have finally realised that for me, going on holiday is not always as simple as it sounds.

I can pack the bags, put the out-of-office on with a witty message, and head somewhere beautiful. But no matter how hard I try, I still find part of my mind drifting back to work. The quiet question is always there; the voice at the back of my head: Should I be checking in? Should I be doing something? What’s arrived in the inbox?

For me, that is one of the strange tensions of running your own business. I love the freedom and flexibility, along with the anxiety and tensions that come with being my own boss. But I also feel the weight of responsibility. As a sole trader, I have no wider team to hand everything over to. I also find it hard to create that neat dividing line where work simply stops and leisure time begins.

Despite the ‘out-of-office ‘, the emails still arrive. And I am thankful that they do. I just have to control the urge to answer them straight away. Ideas still pop into my head. And I do find myself wondering what will be waiting for me when I get back. I do have that inner voice that worries whether I’ve missed an opportunity, or whether taking time out means losing momentum.

But I’m trying to remind myself of something important: rest is not the opposite of productivity. Rest is part of it.

Being away from my desk gives me space to breathe. To be more present with the people I love. To spend time in nature. To move my body. It creates time and space for me to think more clearly. And often, when I stop trying to force ideas, creativity has a way of coming back on its own. Going for a walk, feeling the sand between my toes, hearing the waves crash on the shore often sparks an idea.

I’m learning that looking after myself is not a luxury or an indulgence. Sometimes it is the most responsible business decision I can make. It is a necessity!

That does not mean I always get it right. The out-of-office might be on, but I can still be tempted to check the inbox. The laptop may be closed, but my mind can keep turning over plans, ideas and “what ifs”.

Maybe the goal is not to switch off completely. Maybe it is simply to create enough space to remember why I chose this way of working in the first place.

Because being self-employed is not just about keeping my hand in. It is also about building a life and a business that support each other, rather than them both constantly competing for attention.

So, this is my reminder to myself, and maybe to anyone else who needs it: it is okay to pause.

I have faith that the work will still be there when I return. I have faith that my existing clients will still value the energy, care, and perspective I bring, and that new clients will be around the corner. And if I want to keep showing up well, I have to give myself time to recharge.

If you’re self-employed, do you find it easy to properly switch off — or is this something you recognise too?

#SelfEmployed #SoleTrader #SmallBusinessOwner #WorkLifeBalance #Wellbeing